I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
