Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
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