Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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