Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
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