Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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