Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
