Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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