Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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