i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
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