also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize