I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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