But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
