U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize
