And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
