We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
people are starting to question the shark bite story
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
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