Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
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