You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Porn is love you can see.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Randomize
