I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
My sole motivation for showering this morning was to masturbate. Something is wrong here...
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Randomize
