that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
