Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
Randomize
