forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I need to sanitize my soul.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
