You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
