Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
