You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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