The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
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