Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Randomize
