I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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