Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
