I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
and i looked up. we had an audience...
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
Randomize
