So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Randomize
