There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
