operation have a gay friend backfired
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
