How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
