What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
