Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
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