My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
