Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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