I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Randomize
