69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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