And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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