There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
Randomize
