I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just cut my nipple shaving
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
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