if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
