I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
