She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
