oh god the rape fog is back!
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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