You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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