I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
We are all done wearing pants today
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
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