oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
