Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Randomize
