So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
